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Sounds like our new machines will be rolled out in March or April at work. I guess they use some sort of virtualization software so that you can’t actually do anything you’re not allowed to do in windows. Anything. Want to install firefox? Too bad. Upgrade to the latest NetBeans? Too bad. Want to do your job? Too freaking bad!

Some things I understand, but listen to the software proceedure. If we need a piece of software we need to provide the install medium to some “team” that prepares a network install of the software. A few weeks or months later they provide a way to install the software from the network (presuming that they’ll allow it). Considering I upgrade my NetBeans, MySQL, JBoss, Java, Firefox, and others weekly or even more frequently, how are they going to keep up with demand? Multiply that by some 20,000 employees.

Anyway, it seems stupid for some IT department to want to keep control over their environment so badly that they’d prevent their employees from doing any work. Thank goodness I do all my development in Linux. They can have my Linux over my cold, dead hands. And even then I’d probably just go find a new job. (J2EE developer, anyone?)

Things have calmed down considerably at work. The “troublemakers” were moved to their own room, which suits them as much as it suits me, I imagine. I finally got a phone (after 6 weeks). So now I’m just waiting on two things. First is a real desk or cube somewhere. Second is to get the slow windows computer I have upgraded to the new standard ITD machine as part of our big departmental roll-out. The latter is a bit of a waste as the machine is plenty fast (2.66ghz p4) but just needs more than a quarter gig of ram. My development machine is a 3.00ghz p4 with HT and a gig of ram and running Linux is acceptably fast.

In other news, I’m about done with a little GUI program to generate MD5 and SHA1 sums. It’s Java (of course) and runs just about everywhere. If you download big files you know how useful this little utility could be to tell whether your download is corrupt or not. It should be available for download in the next two days so go get it.

I promised more dirt on the new job, and who am I to disappoint?

One of my coworkers has a chronic dry cough. Like clockwork he coughs twice, then is silent for 5, 15 minutes or more. Well, behind me another coworker gets positively furious whenever he coughs.

“Oh my god!” she swears, sometimes quite loudly.

Then she retaliates with a salvo of her own. What does she do? She coughs back.

Odd strategy. I’m pretty sure the original cougher doesn’t even realize it, and if he did he certainly doesn’t realize she’s coughing to get back at him, and even if he did, I’m positive he wouldn’t care.

But that’s not it, oh no. She then cranks her radio. Nothing like soft rock at high volumes to get back at someone. Oh the inhumanity! But wait, the cougher’s in another room, he probably can’t even hear it. That means I’m assailed by the horror that is soft rock and I’m probably the only person that’s horribly annoyed by it.

Folks, listen, despite what you may think, programming is a very cerebral profession. The work landscape must be one that’s favorable to the programmer if he or she is to be effective. Now, my iPod does go quite loud, however, I’d like to still have my hearing past the age of 40. And that only takes care of the sonic workspace to begin with.

Oh, what I’d give to be able to program in a cave. Fairly dark, nice and warm, with maybe a soft breeze. I’d light some candles so the cave didn’t smell so musty. I’d play some bjork (loudly). Oh, and there’d be beer. And girls in bikinis to bring me beer.

Hrm, my description of the ideal work environment seems to have evolved into some sort of wet dream. Ah well, so be it.

I’ve been in my new position for almost a month now. I have to say that I like what I’m doing – being able to basically concentrate on a primary task and to do it very well makes me happy. It’s developing a J2EE application specific to creating reports for epilepsy patients and to make much of the data queryable for research patients.

So far so good, right?

Well, almost. I have to say that some of the people working around me are nuts. Not in the clinical sense (well, maybe) just in the “I can’t deal with reality” sense.

Take this – I usually eat lunch at my desk so I can keep working and surf news.bbc.co.uk or do something quasi-productive. Well, one of my coworkers, every time I bring food up there starts spraying “air freshener” all over the place while I’m eating. Mmmmm, nothing like a little tetrahydropolychlorofluoroperoxide death spray in my sushi.

It gets better, don’t you worry. Look for more installments in the coming weeks.